You’re Not Doomed to Feel Overwhelmed
Are you doomed to feeling overwhelmed and exhausted as a sensitive person? It may seem that way, especially when you model your daily life after what non-HSPs are doing, but it’s simply not true. Allow me to share a recent experience from my own life that shows what’s possible when you honor your sensitive needs and also what happens when you push yourself too far.
Last month I had scheduled a week off of work to reset. Each Spring I try to take some time off. Sometimes I’ll travel, other times I may get together with friends, but this year I had a strong urge to simply hibernate at home in “staycation” mode. Being able to turn off email, disconnect from social media, and go into my own bubble is a dream for this introverted HSP!
The Joy of Doing Nothing
Whenever I get some time off to myself, I love to lean into the spacious nothingness. This looks like sleeping more, lingering on my yoga mat in the morning for as long as I feel like, getting lost in a book or tv series, and trying out new recipes. Lots of tactile, soothing activities. As I was moving through the week, I decided to notice how much time I truly needed for my morning and evening routines to do the practices and activities that allow me to feel my best.
Turns out I need about three hours in the morning to slowly wake up, practice my yoga/meditation/journaling routine, eat my breakfast, and get ready for the day. I then need about two hours for my evening wind down routine. I was feeling so great on my week off having time for these routines, but was honestly worried going back into work mode. Could I find this much time while also working and managing life?
It was a bit of a bumpy transition back, although as an HSP I tend to need more time with transitions. Being more intentional about how often I was checking email and social media actually freed up a lot of time (no surprise there, I suppose!). After a few weeks, I was in a steady rhythm, getting up at 8am to start work by 11am and getting ready for bed around 9pm to be in bed by 11pm. Being childfree, I thankfully have a lot of time freedom to make this work.
Intentionally Care for Your Sensitive Needs
Quickly I noticed how much better I felt giving myself time to intentionally care for myself in the mornings and evenings. Getting out of bed was much easier. Instead of needing to drag myself out of bed like I sometimes do, I would slowly wake up over about 20-30 minutes then get right onto my yoga mat. Very little decision fatigue or internal negotiating about what to do with my morning. What a relief to start the day with less mental chatter! During the day, I felt more focused and didn’t reach for my usual dark chocolate snack to get through the afternoon.
Then I hit a wall after about a month of this new routine. A while back I had scheduled multiple events in one weekend - I had an event on Friday, was occupied all day on Saturday, and then had a massage appointment on Sunday. My gut was telling me this was too much, but I sadly ignored it.
The next week I felt like a different person - tired and moody. I pushed myself too far and I was clearly paying for it. At night, I couldn’t sleep and just wanted to get lost in my phone and getting out of bed in the morning was hard all over again. I was so disappointed. Despite having that instinct to take something off my calendar, I had broken my own rule of always having one day a week off to do nothing.
Even with all the work I’ve done to learn about sensitivity and my years in therapy as a client, I will admit that from time to time, I still get caught up in wanting to keep up with the pace of everyone else. If this last month has taught me anything, it’s that the cost is just not worth it! Being too overstimulated or irritable to enjoy the people you’re with or being too exhausted to engage in practices that are important feels awful.
Honor Your Limits
This past month was a visceral reminder to honor my limits and trust my instincts as much as possible. Life will continue to throw curveballs, but when there’s a choice to do less - I will take it! The more I take care of my basic needs for rest and downtime, the more resilient I will be when stress inevitably comes along. Even though I got thrown off balance for about a week, I’m back to my routine and feeling grounded again.
As a sensitive person you will have times when you feel overwhelmed with too much going on, you will feel the effects of that overwhelm more than others would, and you will need more time to transition back into balance.
As I always like to remind you, you are more easily stressed, but you are also more impacted by the positive experiences and will soak them up like a sponge! Overwhelm is not permanent, but a state you will move in and out of. What are your rules for living as a sensitive person? What are your non-negotiables and needs for staying balanced?
