The Reason Why You Get Stuck + Procrastinate as an HSP
Ever notice how you’ll really love to do something, but will procrastinate getting started? Or that you’ll be excited to go somewhere, but take forever to leave the house? Or how it’s so difficult to get out of your cozy bed in the morning, but when you do, you’re happy to go about your day?
These are all examples of transitions that you go through on a regular basis. One of the lesser known parts about being highly sensitive is the struggle with transitions or moving between one task/place/activity to another. When you think of transitions, you may think about bigger events like moving to a new home, getting a new job, or starting/ending a relationship but there are so many small transitions throughout every day:
Waking up or going to sleep
Starting a new book
Getting in or out of the shower
Moving from relaxing to exercising
Getting ready for the work week
Stopping work for the night
Starting dinner prep
Whether you’re getting started or wrapping up, you may notice that you feel stuck or frozen. You don’t want to move from where you are or what you’re doing into the next activity. It’s ironic that you may drag your feet going to work, but once you’re there it feels difficult to leave! Even if what’s on the other side of transitioning is positive, it can still feel difficult. Maybe you’re excited to go to your favorite restaurant with your favorite person, but the thought of getting ready to leave the house feels hard. Once you’re there though, you have a great time and leave feeling so grateful you went. The complex inner life of being highly sensitive! As a result of these experiences though, you may beat yourself up for procrastinating, being “lazy”, or feeling anxious. Remember there’s more to the story!
As a highly sensitive person, your brain is wired to engage in some processing and reflecting before every decision or transition you make! HSPs have nervous systems that observe every little detail, think through actions thoroughly before getting started, and prefer to do things right the first time.
This is also why you get overstimulated when you're trying to multitask or concentrate in a noisy environment. Your sensitive system picks up lots of information around you and then processes it at length, trying to figure out:
What does it mean?
Is there any detail I need to remember for next time?
Did anything feel unsafe or uncomfortable?
How can I make this situation better going forward?
Does this remind me of anything?
Your brain is a busy bee and the more changes she goes through in a day, the more tired she’ll be!
Instead of beating yourself up for moving too slowly, letting yourself stay stuck, rushing to get more done, or overbooking your schedule, how can you honor your need for slower and fewer transitions? You could start by cramming less into your day, taking a moment to pause between activities, or reminding yourself that you need more time to warm up and get started.
One way this shows up for me is when I sit down to write - whether it’s journaling, blogs posts, or book pages, I always struggle to get started. There is an initial feeling of resistance and then pressure to organize all my thoughts into something insightful and cohesive. Instead of giving up, I have a little conversation in my mind to remind myself that I need more transition time - in everything, not just writing! So I get out my supplies, then allow myself time to think about what I’m about to do. A few minutes of processing and reflecting allows me to settle in and then I easily get started. With time to ease in, I feel more relaxed and more focused which often leads to hours of writing!
Next time you feel stuck or in procrastination mode before an activity, event, or small transition, slow down to notice:
Do you need anything about the process to be different?
When you’ve experienced something like this in the past, what was the result?
What messages are going through your mind about what you’re about to do?
Are there any words of encouragement you could offer yourself?
Transitions are often thought of as big life events such as moving or starting a new job, but there are tons of small changes throughout every day. Each time a highly sensitive person goes through a transition, your brain wants to pause and reflect - even if just for a few seconds - on what’s about to happen. Whether you’re getting out of bed in the mornings, trying to leave work for the day, or starting a new book, you may find yourself struggling with these changes on a subtle or more obvious level. There’s nothing wrong with you! Give yourself permission to slow down, ease into new activities, take a different approach to getting started, and ultimately reduce the amount of task switching you do throughout the day!
